Value of Funerals
Funerals are for the living, the family members who have lost a loved one. The funeral helps meet a number of the emotional needs of the family. It is similar to other ceremonies in our lives that recognize important events.
The many different parts of a funeral each have specific values to the bereaved family:
Seeing the deceased person helps a person overcome denial that the death has occurred. Until this is accepted, no progress can be made in resolving a person's grief.
Visitation, or gathering friends and family together at the funeral home, helps provide emotional support so needed at this time.
The funeral ceremony can be individualized to reflect the life of the deceased. By including religious beliefs, reflections of occupations, hobbies of the deceased, and memories of the family and friends, we can make the ceremony meaningful and comforting to the family members. This time of remembrance and memorialization often draws meaning from the deceased's life and reminds us that we will never forget them.
Committal to the earth of the remains is the final act we can do for our loved one, by placing them in their final resting place.
Why do we have funerals?
Why indeed? Vernie Fountain, founder of the Fountain National Academy, recently stated these observations in an interview published in the June 1997 issue of "Today in Deathcare". "Anywhere in the world you go, there are certain constants present in each society. In some of the oriental societies, when you are met, there is some sign of greeting. In oriental countries, it's a bow. It may be a kiss on the cheek or a handshake, as in America, along with a greeting such as, Hello, Good morning, or How are you? These initiated a point of contact with another human being.
The other thing that we see as we grow up, is that when we part company with another human being, there is some illustration - exchanging a hug, a handshake or a bow, and there's something we do fairly consistently. We say, 'Goodbye' or 'See you tomorrow at work', etc.
So if I came to your house, sat down at your table and had a cup of coffee and we were having this wonderful conversation and then all of a sudden stood up and walked out of the house without saying something, you would feel out of balance. Now, if I wanted to correct that situation so that you wouldn't feel bad, I'd shake your hand and say 'Goodbye. See you later'.
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