Our chief engineer, Kevin, has a pretty wry sense of humor, and his traditional April Fools' Day prank has suckered more than a few employees - new and old alike.
Here is this year's email:
As you may have noticed, the Syracuse City inspection certificate for our elevator (posted on the elevator wall) expired yesterday, March 31st. While there is no immediate cause for concern now that it is April 1st, certain precautions should be taken:
1) Please limit your daily use of the elevator, planning ahead and combining trips where feasible.
2) Do not press buttons repeatedly. This applies both to the call buttons outside, and the number buttons inside the elevator. Excessive button pressing stresses the control relays and could cause malfunctions. It also makes the elevator operate more slowly.
3) Be sure to have your cell phone with you when boarding the elevator, in case of emergency.
4) Reminder: If you have been hired within the past 12 months, you need to pick up an elevator pass, available in the Engineering office. Please bring two forms of ID with you when you apply for the pass.
5) In case the unthinkable happens and you get stuck on the elevator, you may want to prepare by grabbing a snack before boarding. Laura has a large candy bowl in her office, which is conveniently close to the elevator.
6) As a precaution, Dean will place a cooler with bottled water in the elevator. However, keep in mind the benefit vs. risk of consuming water while trapped in the elevator.
7) You should file an elevator travel plan with Sue at the front desk before using the elevator, so that we will know where to find you should you go missing. Sue will also maintain a signup list for the elevator, to prevent congestion during peak travel times.
8) Engineering has verified that our wireless network system does work on the elevator, so we will place a laptop inside with a freshly charged battery. If you're going to get stuck, you may as well have something to do.
9) Extra weight could hasten elevator failure, so we suggest that you lighten your load by placing your briefcase, handbag, coat, shoes (if they are heavy), coffee mug or whatever on the elevator first. While standing outside, reach in and press the button for the floor you're going to, and then use the stairs to reach the destination floor. When you reach that floor via the stairs, proceed immediately to the elevator, retrieve your items and place them in the hall. Reach in to the elevator and press the button to send the elevator back to your original floor. As the elevator returns to that floor, quickly use the stairs to return to that level. Board the elevator and proceed to your destination floor normally. Remember to pick up your personal items from the hall as you leave the elevator.
10) If you have a good sense of humor, reply to this message and let me know how far through the list you read before thinking, “Now wait a minute!”
Pretty funny, huh? Some people said they got to #5 before saying "Now wait a minute!"
(For the record, Kevin tells me our inspection was renewed earlier this year.)
Do you or anyone you know participate in April Fools' Day? Perhaps an email joke, or a prank at the office. Leave a comment below and tell us all about it. Just remember to keep it clean, please!
